Aphorism Of The Day Pt.27

People are like rubber bands.
If you push them, they bounce back.
If you pull them, they will stretch.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.26

Q: What becomes of a person with borderline disorder if he/she eats a wrong kind of mushroom?
A: Shamanic-depressive.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.25

Good girls go to Cannes.
Bad girls go straight to video. (Or AVN Awards...)

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.24

With Lockhart Dickens you can Freud Jung Kant.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.23

If your life is like dancing on roses, remember to wear shoes.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.22

Popped into my head today:

Q: When you take the trashbag from under your sink to throw it outside, what do you call that gooey stuff that drips from the bottom of the bag?
A: Naples-syrup!

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.21

Wa talking with my housemate again. Again the discussion took a weird turn in a form of one-liners. He said something stupid about love, and the first thing that popped in to my mind was:

Hard core love can't be stopped with a court order.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.20

Modern day motivational ad's tagline:

Release your explodential!

(Works for IT, Office or Car commercials. Or breakfast cereals... Or innovative camera technic... Well, any modern commercial.)

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.19

When you are given black and white paints, why is it wrong to paint in shades of grey?

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.18

To keep the mood of today...

My very good friend Jussi says:

Smile is just a frown upside down.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.17

I broke the laws of physics, but got off with probation.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.16

Do alcoholics deliver themselves?

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.15

If you go to meet someone, it's an appointment. But if you deliberately avoid someone, is that called dis-appointment?

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.14

My housemate, Jussi Niemi a.k.a. Ronsu had an idea. We were writing An Universal Peace Treaty between us, and this is the second clause in the peace treaty.

"All humans have the right to be super-heroes, as long as they don't hurt any innocent people."

I think this can be a tagline for the Watchmen movie...

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.13

I was reading Violent Acres fan-forum today and there was a lot of praise for her writings. Plenty of people said they love her, etc... Somehow this thing about her just popped in to my head today... I thought it was funny. (If indeed this is my idea... maybe I got it from somewhere and my subconscious just tells me it's my idea.)

She's my wet dream. Too bad the liquid is piss and vinegar.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.12

I was just watching Demetri Martin. Person. and in that one he has a joke about half-full and half-empty glasses. It reminded me of my old post. And then I remembered a thing I like to repeat often...

"The life of a pessimist is full of happy surprises."

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.11

This might be quite difficult to get, but this is my opinion about those three...

If you let your soul fly against you, it will never arise from even beneath the remains of you.

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.10

Again, to keep the theme of today's ranting:

Some girls play "hard to get". I play "hard to want".

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.9

Sami's law of Godwinism:
"As a political online discussion grows deeper, the probability of a flamewar involving Godwin's law approaches one."

aka "How Godwin ruined online debates."
aka "The Godwin who cried the wolf."
aka "How I hate Godwin misusers & abusers."

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.8

To keep the mood of today, yet making it a bit lighter:

Common sense is not as common as they make you belive.