Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Weird weekend

This might be a bit long one this time. It's my last weekend. Thursday might be a bit confusing. (The way I wrote, not the day itself.) So you might want to skip that part.

Thursday - Finland is a very small country

On Wednesday a friend of mine called from Finland and asked if I can show his friends around when they come to Amsterdam. I asked when they're coming and of course it was the next day. Two couples were coming and my friend knows the other couple.

I took a Finnish friend of mine with me and went to see those guys. Suddenly another Finnish friend, who also lives here in Amsterdam, called and asked if I was coming there. He knew the other couple and was with them. These two Finnish guys who live here, (The guy I was walking with towards where my friends were, and the other one who was with them already.) I met the first time when I was already living here - and they don't know my friend who lives in Finland. So it was a huge coincidence that two couples are coming over and my good friend from Finland knows the other couple and my another friend knows the other one.

So we went to have couple of beers and I introduced my friend (who was walking with me towards the bar) to the lot. We thought he doesn't know anyone from this group. Turned out that one girl in that group happens to be from the same village where my friend was born.

So all in all, to make this weird thing even more complicated, I try to show this as math-kinda-formula(ish)-thingie.

Me = A
My friend who didn't know anyone = B
My friend from Finland who didn't come over = C
1st couple = D & E
2nd couple = F & G
Another friend who lives in Amsterdam = H

So C called A and told his friends D & E were coming. They come with F & G, but C doesn't know F & G. I was going to meet them with B, when H called, since F & G were coming to visit him with D & E. He knew only F & G, not D & E. I met both B and H in Amsterdam, and neither knew C previously. Turned out G and B were from the same village.

Ach... messy... and the rest of the night became even more messy, which resulted in hangover at work on Friday.

Friday - Strange and weird Finnish happenings

If that wasn't enough, I had yet another friend coming over from Finland - on the same weekend!, so I went out with her and couple of her friends on Friday. We drank some beers and decided to go to the Cave. Usually nice heavy-metal there. This time it was 3 euros to get in. There was a Yugoslavian metal-band there. Excellent music, although it started as mid 90's nu-metal(ish) kinda thing, but it quickly evolved into proper crunch!

There was four of us, and only one table was almost empty. There was one heavy-metal girl sitting at it. We just jumped into the empty table and started babbling away with my friend. Of course we were talking in Finnish and assumed (again) no-one understands and we were just talking about her last one-nighter... quite graphically I might add. On that point the metal-girl on that same table said in Finnish: "OMFG you can't be from Finland too?!" - Of course she had to be Finnish.

When were were sitting there I got info from my housemate he's going to get the new Harry Potter book. It was like 11PM... And the shops open at 8 or 9 next morning. A grown up man is going to show up in Harry Potter queue? Seriously? Queuing for hours for ... well, almost anything is ridiculous. I understand few hour queues in Russia when there's only few loafs of bread for thousand people. But in a western country, where we don't need anything that much...

Harry Potter books are not that magnificent anyways. What's the fuzz? Ok, funny and entertaining, but nothing to form a cult over. Same thing with Da Vinci Code. I had the misfortune of reading it. Nice and entertaining story. Providing you don't know what Da Vinci did or who he was, don't know anything about European history and no clue about Holy Grail mythology other than that story where some moistened bint lobbed a semitar at some dude called Arthur, then yes, on your flight from New York to London, read the book. Otherwise, it's nothing special. Hm. Actually, it is kinda special. Special in a way it is a screenwrite and a book at the same time. When the camera cut is expected, the chapter changes. Scene by scene writing and much details what kind of props and decos you need for the movie. But very superficial info about Da Vinci and the Grail myth. Still, rather entertaining story, although nothing to cause world-wide praise and "book of the century" ravings.

Back to Friday

I was drinking my beer and the band was just starting, I noticed the bass vibrations made the foam on my beer change. It started to look like an eye. I told that Finnish metal-girl who we just met my beer was staring at me. She laughed and looked at my pint. Yes, I didn't hallucinate. It looked like an eye. My friend took the pint to her hand and also looked at it and saw the eye too. When she put the pint back on the table, the eye had changed. Now it was the head of Jack Skellington. Bizarre. Couple of sips and the foam looked like a bat's head, and when the bass vibrations moved the head a bit, the ears became rabbit-like. Now it was Frank from Donnie Darko. I quickly took a sip to get this foam away, and almost succeeded. There was only little bit left. Which looked like the mask from Phantom of the Opera... G-sus! Did they serve me some black-magic beer? And I didn't have a camera. But I'm sure I wasn't going insane, since my friends saw those too.

A while after my housemate came with his girlfriend (and a camera! Too late!) - they didn't get the book. There was a line for like two blocks for the Potter book. They did the wise thing and didn't queue for ... minimum of 9 hours before the shop even opens plus the time when the sheep have gone through the gate and got their reward. They went to the store the next day (on Saturday, so still the first day) and got the book. Without queuing. My housemate took few pictures, though. There was even people dressed up as witches?! Sad. Sad. Sad.

Here's couple:

A huge line around 23:00!

Some were dressed as witches...

Good thing he came to his senses. I was shocked today to read that even Violent Acres was waiting like a tame sheep in line for this single-serving entertainment. Don't get me wrong, nothings bad about reading, and should you like fantasy, good. Read it. I like Tolkien, and even Harry Harrison, but I would not panic if I cannot read the book in the first minutes it was released. She dropped a lot of respect points there. I respect individuality, which this kind of behaviour is not.

Almost the only times when I calculate time is when I need to get something or go somewhere where I expect to be many people. I try to calculate the time when everyone is not there. Even if I want a DVD badly, I will not queue for it for hours. Couple of people, ok, but not more than 10 in front of me. I go to do something else and check back later. If the DVD's gone, I wait for the next shipment. No entertainment is that important.

But people like to queue. Check it out in supermarket the next time you do groceries. You'll see that people are running like headless chicken to the shortest queue. Yes, queue, not the empty kassa. They switch to different queues to get one second earlier, but they remain in queues. I'm sure if you put a queue in the middle of the street, some people will join it without knowing what we are queuing for.

Friggin' sheep. Wasting your lives in queues over cheap entertainment.

Saturday - Hangover

Didn't do much. Pain. A dog bit me inside my head. Drank a zillion litres of juice and smoked fivehundredthousand cigarettes. Went to see couple of documentaries over a friend's place and drank couple of that dog's hairs.

Sunday - Resurrection

Made food. Wiener Snitchel, simple marinaded paprika, dark beer-based jägersoze and fried garlic potatoes. Will post the recipe later.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Aphorism Of The Day Pt.9

Sami's law of Godwinism:
"As a political online discussion grows deeper, the probability of a flamewar involving Godwin's law approaches one."

aka "How Godwin ruined online debates."
aka "The Godwin who cried the wolf."
aka "How I hate Godwin misusers & abusers."

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Open Letter To Queen Elizabeth II

Dear Queen Elizabeth II,

Please, do not let your country to ruin the peace in Europe. I know that UK is fond of the wars in the Middle-East, playing with new toys in the sand, but don't bring unrest to our peaceful continent. Russia, which you have recognized as an independent country, has its own constitution. This constitution has many parts, and one of them seems to be they don't extradite Russian citizens to your country because of this kind of crimes. Why do I need to tell you, the leader of a great nation, this?

We have a similar part in our constitution in Finland; Finland will not extradite Finnish citizens to be trialed in a country where from that crime maximum penalty is a death sentence. You can't make us without us breaking our constitution. How would you feel about any country that takes actions against you if you are not willing to break your constitution? What kind of country would that be? What would be the meaning of the constitution if you wipe your behind with it?

Did you guys extradite Berezovski and Zakajev to Russia? Nope, didn't think so. Seems to me you are practicing the logic of a 4-year old. "I'm not letting you have my toy car, but you must give me your lollipop." What did that one dude say some time ago? "Do to others what you would have them do to you." Show a little backbone, please.

Up until now Aleksandr Grushko has said that they are not counter-extraditing British diplomats, as they want the best of their people and don't want this kind of silly political debates endanger the safety of their people. Please do the same. You can ask, you can beg, you can demand, and you can plead, but still, they have their own laws and it's not right (in so many levels) to force this issue. Extraditing diplomats is a very very bad decision if you want to have at least some diplomatic relations to Russia.

And another point. Russia is not Soviet Union, but they still have - among other things - nuclear weapons. Get it? Nuclear friggin' weapons! You want to willingly test their zen-skills?

Yet another point. Soviet Union survived without UK. Russia is not too far from that kind of independence. You need their natural resources more than they need yours. Are you planning to cut diplomatic relations and with it all trade with Russia? "Hm... My leg is itching. Maybe I just shoot it?" Yes, yes, Anthony Brenton says this incident will not affect the trade between the countries. But for how long? Putin is not (as far as I know) a Buddhist and does not follow Gandhi's teachings. He will not bend in the wind forever, you know.

This opinion has nothing to do with Litvinenko's murder. That was wrong, and yes, it was horrible death. Still I think ends don't always justify the means and solving crime by breaking laws is one of these cases. Especially when it's no ordinary law, but the constitution.

Have respect for it.

Do not wake the bear.

Yours sincerely,

Sami Rautiainen

Monday, July 16, 2007

Ronsu - Ephelant

Anudder friend of mine is doing some interesting music.

Check Ronsu out.


Sunday, July 15, 2007


A very special friend of mine, Anu Vironmäki is a graphical designer. One day we were on a terrace, and I was - as always - concentrated on discussion. She thought my hands were funny, so she took a picture collage of them.

Visit her web page for more images.


Tuesday, July 10, 2007

The Man Who Stole The Moon

My previous post today was about black holes and moon colonization issues.

If we would neglect the barycentric forces we need and such (who needs tides and stabile ocean currents anyways?), with the super collider we could actually change the mass of the moon so we can have it geostationary.

If ESA could make it and we would have the moon always over Europe. We could "steal" the moon from the rest of the world!

...If I only could make it to space first...

More Moonbase Issues Solved!

There's few issues with the moon and a permanent base there. At the moment moon is moving away from the Earth, until tides and the moon have no or very little effect on each other. Then it will stabilize.

Also, if we would use terraforming factories to create greenhouse gases, such as carbon dioxide, the moon's gravity might not be enough to hold the atmosphere and it would escape to space. Due to the size of the planet, it would also heat up and especially cool down more easily.

I have found a solution!

A microscopic black hole!

Apparently it is theorized that the Large Hadron Collider could be able to produce a microscopic black hole. If we build up one single-serving super collider on the moon, run it once to create a black hole small enough that it would stabilize the moon, preventing it from escaping the Earth - it would also give more mass to the moon so the atmosphere might not escape and also it would warm up the moon from inside for couple of decrees.

This kind of microscopic black hole could explain the unusual temperature of Saturn and Jupiter, which would not be this hot only from the sun's rays.

And if we would be able to create black hole generator (I like that word) or this kind of super collider (if you prefer that term), we would only need to use it once, if we calculate the size of the required black hole - when it is created it will pass through the collider, the floor, the whole moon like air and stay in the core. And possibly, just in case run the collider on the dark side of the moon and slightly diagonally to prevent the black hole to go into the core of our Earth.

Solving the issue with moon escaping and possible problem with the windfarms contributing to the moon drifting away issue, also the temperature problem and gravity issues with atmosphere issues! This would solve many many issues, if it just would work!